I am my father's daughter. As such, I have been blessed (or cursed, as it may be) with very...let's say...sturdy ankles. Okay, really, they are cankles. I am not overweight, this is simply the result of my musculo-skeletal structure. I wish I had slim, lady-like ankles, but the cankley ankles I do have serve well to hold up my body and maneuver my feet.
Imagine my shock, surprise, and definite dismay when I found out that July (according the Gold's Gym) is Cankle Awareness Month.
What exactly does this mean, you ask. Well, in addition to making my genetic make-up a disorder worthy of awareness, Gold's explains it this way: "In reality, they are no laughing matter and are something that we help people fight every day. We have created Cankle Awareness month to...give people real, tangible advice they can use to combat them."
Not only do they give exercise and diet tips geared at cankle reduction, they fill me in on the best ways to dress my hideous legs so as to spare others the spectacle of gazing upon my massive lower legs. These tips include: "Look for pants in soft fabrics like cotton or poly blends that drape loosely around the ankle. Skinny jeans, which bunch at the ankle, are a no-no. " and "At the gym, wear bright sneakers to draw attention away from the ankle. Sports socks that reach only to the rim of the sneaker will create longer leg lines. "
I've been thinking about it and I realized I have one more option...I could just cut my legs off altogether. It sure seems a lot easier.
Sadly, I must take the blame for your unfortunate deformity. I don't know what I was thinking when I allowed my race-horse ankles to mingle in the gene pool with the Gamblin propensity to the cankle. What can I say? He was just so darn cute.
ReplyDeletePerhaps Dr. Rey has a solution?
I don't know what the heck you are talking about! Your ankles are beautiful, and never at any moment did I even get close to think the word cankle upon seeing your ankles. YOu are beautiful!
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